Rock
Scissors
Fuck
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
The Winnie the Pooh costume was great until you got drunk and started yelling at the kids asking for pictures.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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