i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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