I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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