Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
Randomize
