I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I want to fling myself into the sun
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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