You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
Please don't give away my fajitas
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Randomize