what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
i drank out of a bidet.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Randomize