Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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