you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Randomize
