Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
