u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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