I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Randomize
