so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
I just farted in the dogs face to show him who's boss
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
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