I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
Randomize
