coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
