I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
can u get pink eye on your cock?
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize