About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
