did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Randomize
