Don't you send me to vm
You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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