My sheets look like a crime scene.
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
just fyi, hangover + ice skates = really bad idea
If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
