i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Randomize
