ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I just want to make out with him forever
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
