who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
You went to the wrong car, tried to open the locked door, and started crying because you thought we were playing a mean trick. Then the owner came...
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
