See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I just crashed on my couch and have no intention of ever getting up again
I will be over with a bedpan and beer
Send help, water and tortillas.
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
