I cockslap morals
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Rumble strips road head = magical
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
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