Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
