So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Pi�atas plus fireworks don't mix well
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
He was a Cher impersonator. They are the draggest of queens
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