Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
OH MY GOD YOU GUYS I JUST FOUND OUT I HAD PHONE SEX THE OTHER NIGHT
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
