Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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