I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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