I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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