So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize