i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
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