i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Less talking, more tequila
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
IT IS CHRISTMAS EVE AND I AM SUPPOSED TO BE HAVING SEX WITH AN ATTRACTIVE BLACK MAN IN THE NEXT FEW DAYS AND I JUST GOT MY PERIOD. WHEN PEOPLE ASK ME WHY I DON'T BELIEVE IN GOD I WILL TELL THEM OF THIS DAY.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
