I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
Randomize
