so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Houston, we have a blender
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
