I'm lost and stupid without you.
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
No subtext here. People are naked.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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