and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Last thing i remember is pounding jager and puking in that nerds george foreman grill. Then i wake up this morning with some random tooth brush in my mouth
Out of desperation, I used the leftover sauce from my goat masala as a mixer for vodka shots.
And that is why we dont do tequila shooters at 1 in the afternoon. Because you go home with a beast like that
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
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