bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
she pinky promised me she was 18
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Congratulations! We have a period
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