The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
50% drunk capacity currently
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Randomize
