i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Randomize
