Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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