My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
