I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
