do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
There was a lot of him and a little penis
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
