i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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