3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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