what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
