i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Randomize
