i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
P.S. I can't hear my feet
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
